Fever ady... luckly just now still manage to drive home...
Well... while driving i thinked alot...
To much but all related to my beloved ex...
Now only i realise that...
All the while...
I was just lying to everyone..
lolx...
I dint let go at all...hahaha what a stubborn person right?
But then so many people there supporting me i sure say i let go d right?
If not then why i cant go tackle another girl?
lolx
I had feelings for alot of girls, but all of those feelings..
Is just a feeling of want to care them and dont want them to get hurt..
Be there for them when they are hurt..
But all this...aint love at all..
Its just...dont want to let people around me
All my friends get hurt and left behind alone....
lolx..
This Sor Lou ler...lolx What to do..
Just now nose sudd bleed that time..
Tot wan die d coz dizzy sommore driving halfway...nearly langgar just now..
haha..
Suddenly tot of writing a letter..
one for my family,
One for my ex...
and another 1 for my friends..
Hmmm well Mun arh..
Since now i still alive..
i hope to tell u that....
I love you so much i cant stop..
I did try to force myself not to love u anymore but...
It seems to be harder than i thought..
U really were the best person to be with actually,
U're gentle somewhere inside..
Always very Soft Heart but ur mouth always
always says things that u dint want to sumtimEs..
Well I know why i not dare to tell u that i want to be with you ady...
Because i guess that(just guessed la) that u ady have another person in ur heart...or maybe not..
But i still hope that we can be the 1 that i'd always hoped for?(Being with a person loving her for the rest of mylife?) i want to fulfill my promise...will you let me to fulfill it?
Now i only know why these few days it came back the stupid awkward feelings..
But then mun arh if u got another person in heart now..just let me know owh..
I will forget that i need to love you till the day i die if u want me to...
I will Support and wish u all the best with da person who is in ur heart now...
I was wrong in the past...alot of people dint know what i did wrong but i did..
Sorry ya? please forgive me....
But i guess all of this is too late ady? or still early? who knows...
I finally still dint dare to read your blog ler...lolx i hope by tomorrow i will..
Now i lying on bed like dead pig aneh...
Cannt do much thing d...
Want to do also body ache and head very heavy..
I did hope that u are by my side taking care of me...like i did when u were sick..
but then...i think its too late for that...
If there were hope...i would appreciate it now...
If there werent hopes, i would really get hurt one last time..
And really get on with my life..
I dont want to live a life with full of lies..
I cant forget how u used to smiled... how u said that i love you...
How u kissed me..
Sor Lou hoh?
But then its good that now i understand why the awkward feeling that i gave u that time...
Well....time pass it dint heal anything also...makes it worst like Jay Chou said. in the song Cai Hong... Time is a poison that i am consuming..
lolx..its not an antidote..
If now ur friends and my friends read this ..
For sure they will be mad..
But i want to write this down..i scare i kena denggi..then die jor...no chance to write d...
For those girls that i have been caring..really hope to be ur kor kor..
lolx
For those friends that have been caring for me in this period of time..
Thanks ya? and regina..i really was over fired of hatred with this Miss Farah
Got to admit lolx...coz she sucks but she did not
reserve to get those valguar words...
Sorry ya?regina..
and my family they also did support me..
Thanks ...
i beta go sleep d feel like dying aneh...hope tomorrow can get better..
Nitezz
Dai Dai thanks owh...for everything...
hehe
U're always the best cousin i can have in the world..
hehe really love you so muchy..(as a cousin hope nobody gets confuse)
I sleep 1st la...nitezz tonight sleep early again lolx...
† Man Zai †
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