tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-87335606595106492832024-03-06T09:28:40.992+08:00Get on Going with My Life...This Person is who he is now...
...Just Learning to Let go and move on...
...Believing in the future and keep moving forward...Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.comBlogger83125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-40921589417185146752022-07-22T17:32:00.001+08:002022-07-22T17:32:44.738+08:002022 How 5 years time flies by.<p> Hi guys. Its been 5 years since then. </p><p><br /></p><p>And now i wonder is there still anyone looking at my page. Well guys. Its been 65 Months since my last post. so i guess it should be time for me to get an record/update on my blogspot.</p><p><br /></p><p>Actually many things happened during these period of time that have passed. <br />First of all. Ive lost 3 most important person in my life. My Mother, My Grandmother and my Grandfather.</p><p>It felt like its just yesterday when I spoke with them. and now they are 6 feet under with a tomb on it. </p><p><br /></p><p>So lately I am trying to get some ideas of how to make more income and if there are any nice things that you can share kindly leave a comment ya. </p><p>Still too many things in mind. Give me some time i'll get my thoughts together and write it here later on. </p><p><br /></p><p>So glad to see the blog is still around. haha luckily i still manage to log in.. </p><p>Till the next blog see ya. </p>Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-15927541767232358982015-10-09T00:18:00.001+08:002015-10-09T00:18:10.103+08:00<br />
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Its been 2 years from my last post. I must be in dilemma for like that long.... </div>
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How have i been you say? Lets see, i'm currently jobless(with some pile of cash in bank and looking for job ) Plus i'm now out of DEBT...<br />
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I guess I'm fine right?<br />
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Well things happen, some goes some stays, I was in a state of Dilemma when my mom Passed away last year DEC 27 2014.</div>
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Well the most thing I learned is that when we are alive. Please If you have anything to say to a person. BE BOLT ENOUGH to say it. The thing is that, I dint get a word of forgiveness from my Mother. No matter how hard I apologies...its just too late... so Lets not repeat my mistake.<br />
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From time to time, we learn, we grow, we cry, we smile, we laugh, we sigh. But please don't forget to get confirmation in current time. Don't live in the past, Nor the future. Live in Present (because its a gift) that's why its call Present.(a quote from Kungfu Panda <the tortoise="">) Its now imprint in my life.</the></div>
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Get going I do hope that there is a good business that I can venture into in the near future *(frankly to say I'm only good at Trading Commodities) but if its related I can make it happen.<br />
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Let's see. Today is 9 Oct 2015 I must walk out of my love lingering on the past. Must live in present.<br />
That must be my challenge this year. I better make it.<br />
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Life is full of challenges right? Lets see I must be employed at least by December, or Start a new business in December.<br />
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That's it for now my supporters. I'm sorry to keep you all waiting for the past few years but thanks for supporting me. I'll be on more frequent so hope you'd support me till the end of my years.</div>
Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-3623588178629432742013-11-26T00:18:00.000+08:002013-11-26T00:18:13.616+08:00Its been A Year... I'm back...Hmm I left my blog for a year... and I'm back just to write how it went the past year...<br /><br />I'm soon to be 25 now... damn soon...<br />
Yet i'm so near towards my million ringgit Collection........<br />
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I hate to say but after being a workaholic... I realize something...<br />Damn i need love... hahahaha</div>
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Well I just Messed up every single relationship I had in the past...<br />But I'm certain that The next one that's coming (which i hope it would come)<br />Will be a relationship that will last for my (this life)...<br />A relationship that's like a family...</div>
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I guess when money aren't problem in your life... <br />Next thing you would really look for must be love?</div>
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Well In Short... In the past years... I've been living a lonely life but still i did Lots of things..<br />Things that would really change my life...<br />Like business and challenges that appear in it..<br />Well People's that i've met... Its just the best in my life...<br />Thank God for giving me such a great blessing.. <br />But GOD.. please Just make it Better...</div>
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After such a long period of time.. Thanks for those who visit my Page...<br />Thank you For all the supports...<br />
<br /> With Love: Joel<br />
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<br />Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-84879112414827895232012-11-17T23:27:00.002+08:002012-11-17T23:27:42.944+08:007 Months have past.. Many things have changed..<div style="text-align: center;">
For the past half of the year.. I've been working real hard.. and end up with what I am now.</div>
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Many things happened in the past 6 month.<br />I was in pain, in gladness, but most of the time I'm thankful to GOD for what thy has gave me.</div>
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Well lately I've been thinking.. What's the next phase in my life.</div>
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Time flies you see? I've been in this situation for the past 2 years and lately I've been thinking..</div>
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The things that I thought of is an Ideal Life, with a family of my own.</div>
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I've hit my goals but what's next?</div>
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I've thought of the girl who's willing to love me unconditionally</div>
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A girl who'd give her world to me.</div>
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A Girl whom we would hold hands together until the day we part ways..</div>
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A girl who'd be there when I reach home..</div>
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The phrase that she will whisper to me : "babe/hon/bee how's your day today?"<br />In my mind I'll tell her: "bee, its harsh day in my life.. but with you in it its a paradise" </div>
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then when she tell's me:</div>
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"I made you breakfast/lunch/dinner"</div>
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No matter I'm full or not. I'll definitely finish the whole thing that she made.<br />Even it makes me to feel awkward or vomiting I'll finish it and tell her: "bee thanks, its lovely"</div>
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I'll whisper to her ears every night and morning </div>
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"I Love You" </div>
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provided with a smile in my face no matter how harsh my life gets.</div>
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Well this was my thoughts lately that's been disturbing me.</div>
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Why did I say so you may ask..</div>
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Well I'm now in such situation.</div>
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I'm working from 3. pm to 11. pm.</div>
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Later on I will start working from 11. am to 11. pm.</div>
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The rest of the time I'll be preparing for my own business,</div>
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Well there it goes. Where do I have time to spend with my "Another Half"</div>
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(or if there's someone who's willing to be mine) </div>
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So.. I've made a decision that makes me think a lot lately..</div>
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The decision was to Wait for the Mrs Right to appear while I work hard.</div>
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But during at night time I'll thought of being single for 3 years is an unhealthy lifestyle..</div>
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I'm now making only about RM3000~RM4000 per month.</div>
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And my business will expend soon.. so I hope GOD bless me </div>
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Bless me with a girl who's willing to be by my side.<br />AMEN.</div>
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A Girl who's willing to spend the rest of her life just with me and our family. </div>
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Well It's nice to come back Blogging after 6 month's </div>
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I love You all</div>
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And Thanks for Supporting my blog.. </div>
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With Love:</div>
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Thanks..</div>
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Please do continue to support me!!</div>
Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-55140451936086886952012-04-16T02:04:00.002+08:002012-04-16T02:16:32.202+08:00Well Hello to my Blog.. its been 3 months^.^Haha Its been awhile since i've updated my blog..<br />Well I've been in shape lately.. although illness did come and go but those are small matters..<br /><br />in such a short time i've realize how a person can change but de heart will never change...<br />I tried to do something insane but well i just cant.. haha so it dint happen...(that thing is to get into a relationship with any girl.. but end up when i wanted to start u're just all in my head) haha so i dint..<br /><br />Well thanks to that now i'm fullforce on my work and business..<br />just past few weeks i've gain a new opportunity.<br />Its about franchising. and i'm going to do it right...<br /><br />Time has pass and come by so fast and quickly.. i totally forgot how "you" hurt me so much during ur days back in penang(aka the last day b4 u leave penang) that wound its already became a scar..<br /><br />I'm really stupid aint I? at one hand being able to gain an income of more then 20k per month (now) and on the other hand still thinking about you...<br />I really miss you alot..<br />Do you know? that day when tremor hits penang.. the 1st thing i thought of is "you".. damn i sent a msg to you i thought u dint reply.. i only realize u replied instantly via facebook..<br /><br />i dint know how to start a sentence so i used this " did you felt that in kl?"<br />frankly to say my mind is all about you and i'm blank in my mind..just you..<br /><br />haha i'm just a stupid idiot.. u hurt me so much yet i'm still waiting like a stupid donkie..<br />Well time flies and opportunity just come to me.. within 2 years time i'll get myself several units of house and also some great investments to improve my lifestyle..<br /><br />Till then or in between the happenings i hope we can be togather.. C.Y..<br /><br />Well not to expose too much and its so late.. i've been busy with tons of meetings lately.. its alilbit driving me crazy.. but i know its worth doing while learning..<br /><br />Its not the time for me to stop.. i just need to keep going forward.<br />And look for more opportunity to improve my standard.<br />So i can reach my target.. in a shorter time.<br />Thank GOD , Blessing me with the ability, strength, and knowledge to increase my EQ and IQ.<br /><br />Well Last but most least...<br /><br />I Love You. C.Y.<br />And to all my family and friends... and also blog walkers..<br />Thanks for viewing my story...and do continue to do so..^.^.^Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-17863261570995280242012-01-16T23:27:00.002+08:002012-01-16T23:40:23.661+08:00Well Done Joel.. New year has arrived...<br />Its the 1st Year me Starting as a Diabetic Patient Type 2.<br />And its been diff 2 month since I've updated my blog..<br /><br />Well 1 thing that Made my YEAR 2012 Full of Happiness... Is the Present I Receive From a Person whom I've been waiting for an answer(well which means we're just Friends now)....<br /><br />Frankly to say.. I mean just a word in my mind, Why did u purposely gave me such an Surprise? I was SOo Damn Happy as if I would Really SHOUT out LOUD that day..<br />I thought I was DREAMING... lolx Well On end of December, the only person who gave me a Birthday PRESENT for 2012 with a surprise in it...<br /><br />Hmmm, Well I really wonder now if you really have feelings for me.. or you just treat me as a friend..<br />I... well have been 暗恋 situation for like the past few years..(few as in above 3)..lost track.. but still..<br />If u dint sent me the present.. I would just continue do what I did for the past few years...<br /><br />Frankly to say I just have the urge to ask u “我们交往吧”.... LOL but in reality I might not have the courage since that day(although i forgot when was it) but I do still remember u telling me..<br /><br />"When I want a GUY(or)Boyfriend, I'll look for one" which was told to me 1 year ago...<br /><br />Since then I never even dare to nag or appear in ur msg.. Because I know.. 80% of the messages that I text you never really have a reply due to *what kind of msg are u sending me* in ur mind..<br /><br />Well I cant just Text u "I Love You" just like that can I?... LOL<br /><br />So I ended up text you things like "Good Morning" or "How's Life in KL"<br />Well I really do hope that u would waste some money just to reply i'm fine or Good morning and stuff.. But for you, I will think that its better Not to reply.. so you can save more money on phone bills.. hehe..<br /><br />Well its been few years I've got no replies most of the time that I did not give up but stop bugging your phone.. I'm afraid that one fine day u may dislike me or hate me for being "Annoying"..<br /><br />So Now my life is to keep my body in shape and work hard for what i've aim for.. minimum a house to stay... which is another 2 years down the road.. and also a good income... for now its like reduced to 2k+ per month which suck up most of the time..<br /><br />I need more new things to improve my income.. and I really cant wait to meet her with an excuse(Lets go discuss about the business that u want to talk to me) haha<br />Well I do hope it works but I'm just afraid that she's too busy while she's in Penang which most of the time she hang out with her 姐妹 or family instead of looking for me...<br /><br />Well this kind of situation I'll just focus on my work.. but It troubles me and made me shed tears during driving alone going back home(during that period sometimes when I tot of me being single or.. I don't even know why) I shed tears .<br /><br />Well then back to the Year of Dragon.. I'm a DRAGON but I'll work harder just to improve my life...<br /><br />Target SET Just let things Happen.. like a Padre once told me,<br />Pray, Hope and don't Worry..^.^<br /><br />For now Savings will help a lot in years to come...<br />And 1 more thing<br />I love you..<br />*To my Family, Friends, blog walker and most especially her)Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-34792168367362471782011-11-09T00:21:00.004+08:002011-11-09T00:50:06.218+08:00Its been 4 monthsSo.. i did not realize how fast time travel..<br />4 months have passed since i knew i have Diabetic..<br />Was a shock at 1st but thanks to it i am now under (overweight List) no longer Obesity.<br /><br />Now my Weight is averagely around 94kg to 96 kg..<br />Well also thanks to it now i know where my limit is and where i can boost more..^.^<br />Thank god for blessing me all this kind of things even thou i'm in a very serious situation thou..<br />My family members supported me MOST.. and also Friends(close ones)..<br /><br />Within this period i learn alot about health and food consumption which will cause what kind of illness.<br /><br />But then my target.. is now Lacking alot.. from what I set this year...<br />I've grown thinner now.. well i still feel that i'm fat BTW..<br />But then alot of friends whom i did not meet up for longer then 3 months all was kinda shocked when they saw me.^.^<br />Happy for that thou..<br />Well i'm glad that now i dont know why but i feel like to let go all things and just live my life to the max..<br /><br />The things i planned seems changed alot in the schedule.. Time.. and incident..<br />Just few months have change my life totally..^.^ should i be happy or sad? i dono..<br />Coz now i can see no future in me.. due to" ahem.. well i might collapse anytime any moment.."<br />That's diabetic.. u wont know when or what its attacking but it will one fine day..<br /><br />From now on.. I have new goals..<br />Food Consumption + Medication must check daily..<br />Sugar level in blood must check daily..<br />Healthy Lifestyle is already a MUST..<br />Income must grow have to make new moves..<br />Time flies so.. b4 i'm 25 i have to finish the task and continue with my degree and Masters Degree...<br />used up more then 3 months to recover from the hospital medication..<br /><br />Now is time to FIGHT!!<br />btw.. Why am i still single?... LOL<br />Alot of people dont believe me=.=<br />But I am.. I'm not seeing any girls now.. just focusing on work.. WTF..<br />I should Balance my life up.. LOL.. Time is short!!<br /><br />Well I better get to bed now.. TMR morning Hiking!! hope can capture some pictures but i dont bring my phone to hike all the time..^.^ so.. hehe..<br />Nitez all thanks for viewing my blog..Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-35555999917670825592011-11-03T11:48:00.004+08:002011-11-03T12:14:20.043+08:00Hi People's Lets Smile More^.^When time pass by.. i realize alot..<br />not to say I'm being mature or something,<br />Its just that now I realize how important it is even if you're not a somebody..<br />The existence of everyone is important..<br />by just living all life to the max will show alot of difference in the society..<br /><br />For me I've learn how to live without her being around..<br />Although i got to admit i cant simply let go.. and i know alot of Guys still Tackling her..<br />I felt afraid of one fine day she'll tell me that she's in a relationship..<br />Today i saw another guy waiting for answer..<br />Well its obvious..<br /><br />If she comes back for Christmas..<br />I'll sent her one last present..<br />In it will be my last invitation..<br />I will just accept the fact that she's not into me and move on if she rejects,<br />I'll also let things be and move on in my life if she dint give in any answers..<br />But if she wants me to wait i'll be here Penang waiting(while fighting for my career)<br /><br />Its true that we must have a balance..<br />I felt one thing from the lesson thought via Experience..<br />If I have my career and Money..<br />but I don't have another half to spend with..<br />whats the purpose of having it at the 1st place?<br /><br />So I need to balance up everything now..<br />If not I'm afraid I might not be able to get married b4 age of 30.<br />I'm afraid of Loneliness as others does so..<br />Hmmm I BET I must continue save money to create more business opportunity in life now..<br />Focus on business 1st Time will come if it is mine.<br />I must take action by then..^.^<br />Consequences, I will accept it and move on^.^..Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-12107382108505015552011-10-20T15:05:00.001+08:002011-10-20T15:07:38.675+08:00我喜歡你、但我不敢愛你我喜歡你,那我可以憑一時的衝動為你做好多好多的事,不計較你是否喜歡我;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為如果愛你,我會期望你為我做同樣的事,時間久了我會不平衡。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,那我可以傻傻地喜歡著你;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為我認為愛,應該是相互的。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,那我可以一直很激情地瘋狂地;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為愛太理智,我總會在對比中迷失自己。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,那我可以默默地,偶爾跳出來嚇你一跳;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為愛太需要一直好好表現,永遠拴住你的心,我暫時還沒有那個自信。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,所以我才會那麼多那麼多看似瘋狂而不靠譜的事情;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為你的愛太難得到,我想留下的是我一心一意喜歡你的回憶。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,所以我才會默默地不做聲,期待你的音信;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為愛的要求總是太多,我沒有資格要求什麼。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,所以我才想貼近你的生活;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為你似乎沒有想要瞭解我。<br /><br /><br />我喜歡你,才會告訴自己要高貴一些;<br /><br />但我不敢愛你,因為我不想讓自己變得卑微。Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-7601660272931334292011-08-12T23:06:00.003+08:002011-08-12T23:41:55.864+08:00180Degree Change in My Life..
<br />Its been awhile since i've been blogging again, i'm back..^.^
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<br />Well this time i got this to share with you all... A thing that changed my life 180 Degree..
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<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2RHrW9l7mwzu4160yYF3l1yuc8s1Fyoh8oQu-qmLa_VM5v0GcIU48TPnGMir_YwJYQD07DKdj7Oye8b3ESRi403bR0PF0396rkLRy-_CGC9dw7tcoRqO9oCARL0lvPTeXnGGsLEZf8Cto/s1600/278702_10150249012732339_727362338_7728418_901342_o.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2RHrW9l7mwzu4160yYF3l1yuc8s1Fyoh8oQu-qmLa_VM5v0GcIU48TPnGMir_YwJYQD07DKdj7Oye8b3ESRi403bR0PF0396rkLRy-_CGC9dw7tcoRqO9oCARL0lvPTeXnGGsLEZf8Cto/s400/278702_10150249012732339_727362338_7728418_901342_o.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5639987093911359330" border="0" /></a>
<br />Cool Right? Well I Didn't expect it to be this way either..
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<br />It all start when i went to Langkawi... I took alcohol like drinking water..
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<br />Its been awhile since i've enjoyed so much Alcohol but.. It was a beginning of a Nightmare to me..
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<br />After a week the effect start to take place... My liver and Gall Bladder went outbound but i dint realize.. i still thought it was gastric, so.. took a couple of injection and gastric med It was of no help and i manage to hold it for 1 week before i went into hospital to check it out whats wrong...
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<br />After 2 days suffering pain and egony in hospital i found out that my gall bladder was stuck by a stone in it.. and My liver was infected and grew until 16CM long.. which is quite unbelievable..
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<br />SHOCKING to found out this but i got alot of antibody and injection to cure it and manage to avoid operation...
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<br />Now the best part that change my life is this..
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<br />Well On the 5th day after they made alot of test on me.. They found out something which i was SHOCKED to hear from them.. I'm now a Diabetic Patient..
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<br />SHOCKING RIGHT?!! lolx I was shocked at 1st.. but from discharge until now its been 2 weeks...
<br />I'm getting use to all the changes.. Starting from Food to Lifestyle to activities.. All have changed..
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<br />I told myself NEVER regret on what i do in the past, Endure and Learn From it, Face the facts in the Present, Future will come when it should be there..
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<br />Now i really learn how to live healthier, but sadly i cant take all those delicious foods anymore..
<br />Water wize.. i bet Plain water will be with me until the day i pass away..
<br />Its a huge change including now my wieght.. its leaving me .. soo fast.. i cant believe i can have such a nice body shape lately..
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<br />Should i THanks god for all this blessings? Continue my Super Duper positive thinking? or should i just ....
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<br />Well I've already chose a path, I Thank Dear Lord Jesus, Almighty Father who bless me this. Everything happen for a reason in Life. I know now. Thanks for teaching me this way GOD.
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<br />Well what really worries and disturbs my feelings lately is that.. I don't know weather i'm still qualify to date a girl whom i love (1 sided) since I last broke up(2yrs and 3 month ago).. Her name is Carmen,Y.
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<br />Well frankly to say i was never being able to let her go since... (should be 4 years ago already..) when we 1st Met in a class in SEGi..
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<br />But now thinking back, she had such a strong family and soo many admirer looking forward to date her.. and she's now living her life in KL(Kuala Lumpur). I'm now in Penang...
<br />
<br />So.. i was going to date her out during her holiday in Penang u know? (oMG i feel like talking to a Blog while i write this) .. but then now.. think of it. i'm afraid that she'll tell me not to... like she use to tell me back then(she would not want to have Boyfriend but when she wants she'll go look for it)
<br />That's when i told her (When you want to look for Boyfriend, Please put me on the list)
<br />
<br />Hahax stupid me. now i do wish she'd take me OFF the list... I'm no longer in a healthy condition to be with her anymore.. i might make her worry MORE(like when i went into hospital.. she WORRIED) i was like OMG why did i make her worry...
<br />
<br />She might still not know that i have Diabetic.. so i'm so confused lately. I really do hope some1 can consult me.. give me advise on what i really should do.....
<br />
<br />Lately i've been working real hard despite all the pain that my body have been causing me..
<br />I want to forget about Love.. I loved a person for soo long.. am i stupid?......
<br />
<br />I dont know now..
<br />
<br />Thanks to blogging i can like type out what that is corrupting in my mind.. But then I hope this will not make me regret, I'll continue my work.. Date her as plan.. But i might not express myself to her.. i'm afraid she might get into a hard position where she'd afraid to lose a friend (if she say no) and if she loves me then everything will go well but we are separated from KL to Penang.. that might cause a problem for her.. i guess its not a good time to do that.. So...
<br />
<br />Its Decided then.. (well frankly to say she might not even agree to come out with me on a date) so..
<br />Lets not put so high hope since she's busy on her studies.. let her be.. She'll be fine cause i Believe in her....
<br />
<br />Well Lets talk back to my life now.. 180degree change..
<br />I have to work out every morning.. work at noon and night.. so i'll be healthy i hope..
<br />Its time to bed now it took me 30 minutes just to put out all my crap that's in my head...
<br />
<br />PS: Dear God, Please don't Let Carmen.Y Found out about this Blog page, and pray hard for her not to stress herself too much, She can make it through her test. I believe in it she will..^.^
<br />Bless her to be healthy too..^.^
<br />
<br />Amen.
<br />Nights all and thanks for those who's been viewing my blog..^.^ Please continue support me.. Advise me if can i'm now still struggling.. did i make the right choice?.. i'm still confused but i'll go with what i got if no other option came out which is better.. Nightzz. Sweet dreams..
<br />Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-42522447610515438552011-06-26T02:27:00.002+08:002011-06-26T02:34:15.973+08:00Its goin to be end of June now..Well tonight i was suppose to be happy...<br />But then Love kinda strike me big time.. I'm insomnia again..<br /><br />What a great day with excellent sales... And I'm goin to start a new business soon.. real soon..<br />Just that i wonder what kind of love will i really have?(as in relationship ones)..<br /><br />Well I've been in love with a girl for the past 2 years.. but never tell her b4..<br />(Or maybe i did...) well she's in KL now so.. I'm so confused..<br /><br />I felt like she might move on.. got a new life new challenge..<br />yet here I'm in Penang.. wondering how to tell her.. aint i stupid?....<br /><br />Well i am thinking about something when this feeling which appeared few times b4..<br />It just pop out from nowhere.. now i'm having a dilemma thinking of what can i do..<br /><br />Frankly to say nothing much..(rationally) but i wanted to do something for her this year... as a present.. ended up she told me (Don't want la simply give me chocs can d) LOL.. what a thing..<br /><br />Well its 2.30am now what can i do.. can i just stop the time and space so i can rearrange all things out? i don't know.. I've been focusing on business and work for like 2 years now.. i wonder sometimes where am i now...????<br /><br />I'm now like in a crossroad... but this time.. there are like 1 million path in front of me...<br />God please help me.........Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-77804898534776791602011-05-19T01:15:00.002+08:002011-05-19T02:06:34.024+08:00Things that i've done past few weeks..Its been weeks since i've updated my blog...<br /><br />Well during the past holiday(Wednesday) I've successfully gathered several of my primary buddy's to join me go Penang Hill... although some did not make it but.. hope they'll make it on the BIG MOVE...<br /><br />These are some photos to share with..<br /><br /><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiydOp__Q2bjK6C6I6aI6yJ5WMD3QlYunWEpMTrtH8EKyCSNjr00yJsHCfjLUqTfA9jNN3jlSGqtHKCbCEVkdyxFWsmkogPx1b2IB-rAltymXiZaKsntEefu1lRHhBD_TZOxwz46NOeIJkT/s1600/Hill.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiydOp__Q2bjK6C6I6aI6yJ5WMD3QlYunWEpMTrtH8EKyCSNjr00yJsHCfjLUqTfA9jNN3jlSGqtHKCbCEVkdyxFWsmkogPx1b2IB-rAltymXiZaKsntEefu1lRHhBD_TZOxwz46NOeIJkT/s400/Hill.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112409978538642" border="0" /></a><br />The View below Penang Hill.. </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIledn4bQ06m77lRnrkSn4HOHu7raCsAhp8WftaJfpL3tss_BFlwG5GgSafKvXPBdq4kOR_EF_XK1sFf_zVDHs5rZHFXoiFYABnOhn9yK0dyVo4X0cgKeArgyO_KaU6frcx-0Z94nyb_Sy/s1600/P+hill.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIledn4bQ06m77lRnrkSn4HOHu7raCsAhp8WftaJfpL3tss_BFlwG5GgSafKvXPBdq4kOR_EF_XK1sFf_zVDHs5rZHFXoiFYABnOhn9yK0dyVo4X0cgKeArgyO_KaU6frcx-0Z94nyb_Sy/s400/P+hill.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112180733125042" border="0" /></a><br />The Station have been(ahem) Upgraded...<br /><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3eZEQo4GRLSwG-jUtY2OKWziAoay8I8eIdRiU6zTW3JcJUbrwvTCymvFYjADGyzCgNX5yQyn2J9JJWt6fHWp98S0R3kHnOlcbT8Omx0zncQO-EaRv4Jc4kSaTyq7r6fwnjlRSN9L1aeVZ/s1600/Hill+View.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3eZEQo4GRLSwG-jUtY2OKWziAoay8I8eIdRiU6zTW3JcJUbrwvTCymvFYjADGyzCgNX5yQyn2J9JJWt6fHWp98S0R3kHnOlcbT8Omx0zncQO-EaRv4Jc4kSaTyq7r6fwnjlRSN9L1aeVZ/s400/Hill+View.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112407267058130" border="0" /></a><br />It took us less then 15 mins just to reach from bottom to top..(its efficient i can say) but i still prefer the slow ones where we can enjoy the view's during the ride up & down.<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA_uGCCAyOZIB6YYbV-jm5hAo5FHa5rcpWdp3_D22nDSj65Qz16tE77UWaVPreXduhEn9qvwQkO1dVHUnJtKRkePwZVFT4w9FVwAebJ-o0J3PwxobnW1Ra4bmdWmz3CCSmjxG1ih835fqZ/s1600/H+View1.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA_uGCCAyOZIB6YYbV-jm5hAo5FHa5rcpWdp3_D22nDSj65Qz16tE77UWaVPreXduhEn9qvwQkO1dVHUnJtKRkePwZVFT4w9FVwAebJ-o0J3PwxobnW1Ra4bmdWmz3CCSmjxG1ih835fqZ/s400/H+View1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112188153268946" border="0" /></a><br />I was surprised that they have the golf course car.. its provided for the visitors to end their visit without walking alot...<br />AKA lazy Tourists.<br /></div><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi44ti6jrNSgvAlnNjSztVKfvhfwPPJrs9T-gouTmbZ1DW_-jMx4KMRWChXzd4QZN6a88hRdudPwtYu7oNyjw-2GjU2-gQoLU63VYEPqNxpGwrxtD-LrkOG2azYpq-SgxHyaBnoJw-oPf6M/s1600/H+View.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi44ti6jrNSgvAlnNjSztVKfvhfwPPJrs9T-gouTmbZ1DW_-jMx4KMRWChXzd4QZN6a88hRdudPwtYu7oNyjw-2GjU2-gQoLU63VYEPqNxpGwrxtD-LrkOG2azYpq-SgxHyaBnoJw-oPf6M/s400/H+View.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112188457306482" border="0" /></a><br />This is the view(kinda dark cause when we reach its about to rain d)<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZbuuKoMiPNMkxgEe3XgLiVH2-t2OkfOMfRoHR7gmR18iqJhl5NRKWwMQa6pIY1VOsysWUfkKt8ExBJ9YCyj9LpoXWpJrTw7SkqM8JyFhX8_o4nQ5TuvDlgeSQElhQNk2UBD1obW_nlxqs/s1600/Penang+Hill+Trop.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZbuuKoMiPNMkxgEe3XgLiVH2-t2OkfOMfRoHR7gmR18iqJhl5NRKWwMQa6pIY1VOsysWUfkKt8ExBJ9YCyj9LpoXWpJrTw7SkqM8JyFhX8_o4nQ5TuvDlgeSQElhQNk2UBD1obW_nlxqs/s400/Penang+Hill+Trop.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112177361488050" border="0" /></a><br />This is the (96KG) me on top of the 1st generation funicular cable car..<br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU4bpdDsI4PneaxVNyhUEJ3OZdVg8YIL-6r-cmVt77riX6_fGAoawybKIgFU8H8UCkxEYc_4JO8h83cCHJp2X46KftkmsNdqGy0oXAewvbbSN2ewE9xbNfSUgT55GxvraT1H1N18J100gI/s1600/Hill+Food.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU4bpdDsI4PneaxVNyhUEJ3OZdVg8YIL-6r-cmVt77riX6_fGAoawybKIgFU8H8UCkxEYc_4JO8h83cCHJp2X46KftkmsNdqGy0oXAewvbbSN2ewE9xbNfSUgT55GxvraT1H1N18J100gI/s400/Hill+Food.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112407799129842" border="0" /></a><br />The Ice Kacang that we have after the Fearful visit of a (haunted mansion) In Penang Hill..<br />Luckily we made it out safely..<br /><br /></div><br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiznPMbMU-_1V8QRtel_kKKRfjk25GRfy94J-UqB5k2_yjU6S14wG1fs3jGBp5WE14P53GNcPCTuYo3-dF_tsSqje2vax1_-o7UOTF72Rf1e1u2HtSkmi2brWrBsS3zKnYYRY0-1EyevCVW/s1600/Henna.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiznPMbMU-_1V8QRtel_kKKRfjk25GRfy94J-UqB5k2_yjU6S14wG1fs3jGBp5WE14P53GNcPCTuYo3-dF_tsSqje2vax1_-o7UOTF72Rf1e1u2HtSkmi2brWrBsS3zKnYYRY0-1EyevCVW/s400/Henna.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5608112416419639346" border="0" /></a><br />Something that interest me.. Looks Similar to tattoo..<br />BUT its Henna(Indian Traditional Body Art)<br />well..<br />at first i was shocked that the Indian culture would Adopt such a (Fashion) Design<br />But they have improve..<br />this show's that time have improve not only technology,<br />but also human's brain...<br /><br /><div style="text-align: left;">Well after that i went to work and during night time ..well i did something out of my control..<br />Help-ed my friend in his assignment i guess... but i'm in his movie..(Lame but) haha i was shocked to say ok when he asked..<br /><br />Hope to see the video when he's done with it..<br />Well after all these days until Monday i fell ill.. very ill for the pass 2 days i was in High fever 39 Degree Cels...<br />But i still have to work.. so eventually i dint even go and ask her about meds that the docts gave me i just take la... i'm afraid that i would be annoying her or what.. i dont even know what she's busy-ing lately.. she just ignored my sms? or she dint get my sms.. i dont know what happened to her.. well despite being neglected by her..<br /><br />All i can say is that i'm now still sick.. its thursday already... although fever has come down but this food poisoning is causing me more then that.. body ache.. vomit....<br />arh.. I prayed to god just so she's healthy and happy..<br />So would I be healthy..and happy<br /><br />Well business going so far (good) only.. but better then nth ...<br /><br />I want to grow.. after June i'll Burst out of the Hot Rat Race(i hope)..<br />but i dont think things will run well in such a short term.. so i'll work hard to achieve my target..<br /><br />Neway.. since she's not able to read my blog or she may.. wanted just to ask her<br />Hey, How're you lately?<br />Still busy-in with your Scholarship?<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Well from all those things.. i just want to listen to her talking or even reading what she type's in the computer via MSN or anything just to contact her...<br />Seems like she's avoiding me more then being busy...<br /><br />Well just let it be?(again? like 4 years ago?) my god.. my close friend.. i cant lose her again...<br /><br />lolx. what am i thinking.. she dint even want to get into a relationship.. and i'm (still not) a (candidate) of her chaser(or person who's chasing her)...<br /><br />I'm just her friend...(atleast that's what i know of)... So then.. Back to my Struggling life.. its 2am in the morning now.. i'd better go to bed now.. Tata!! Nitezz people's<br /><br />Thanks for those who's visiting my blog.. pls post a hi on the shout box..^.^<br /></div></div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4BPjqILbcJnFGzB9u34GYa7KkUkgTFg3mSLU7C3QI7wmoWFnzza7SQUfn4youwYkCYrobXkpj_doGilGtrWZ6VUlk_I0oYOHiXYph41y3z_uSgSnFeIEQbhp748HqFPEumcohlebu2WrU/s1600/Hill.jpg"><br /></a>Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-9678756700576580492011-05-09T05:04:00.004+08:002011-05-09T05:16:30.344+08:00InsomniaWell its been awhile since i have insomnia.. its 5am in the morning.. i'm still awake...<br />Cut my finger this time but its alright.. just a small fracture...<br /><br />Well whole day i was thinking of something which i'm not sure of..<br />I wonder whats that.. i cant really remember about it<br />The business from 2 branch to 1 branch... well the revenue increase... but branches lowered..<br /><br />Sometimes places can indicate a business successful nor failure..<br />But then i'm not sure what i'm typing now.. maybe i'm lost once again?<br />But i was assure of what i wanted until.....<br />until.....<br />When was that?......<br />Until i meet a person who asked me the question 5 years ago a teacher asked me...<br /><br />I cant really see what i want now...<br />I wanted to study..(SOO BADLY) but... i want my business to grow as well...<br /><br />i cant do both together.. so.. confusing now..<br />How i hope i can chat wif her... but she seems like busy/avoiding to chat wif me?(Well i guess she's busy)<br />(If not so.. did i do something that made her misunderstand?) i don't know..<br /><br />Well a good news is that i'll be FREE in PENANG for ...erm.. 2 days.. (Coming Wed and Thurs).. which is.. wait let me check the date... hmmmm 11 and 12 of May..<br /><br />Kinda boring or bored lately... besides my routine and stuff.. exercise have been a good companion to me lately...<br />hiking/swimming/QiGongTraining/Martial Training AkA Weng Chun(i just remembered 8 sets out of so many...)...<br />but i wonder why do i do those things? just to distress?...What are stress to me?...<br />Lots of questions and i already have the answer... i just let my brain to stop functioning just for a short moment.. let the questions be the questions and answers be the answers..<br /><br />I might be having a split personality.. but i dont think it is that way.. its just i'm idle-ing all the way since 1am just now until... now? 5.11am<br /><br />I'd better go and try to get to sleep again.. nitez all sweet dreams..<br /><br />Love sometimes makes a person go mad, but at the same time.. it makes the person feel alive....<br />^.^Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-73852201360515871902011-05-03T00:34:00.002+08:002011-05-03T00:39:11.824+08:00Injuries...LOL.. its been awhile.. or aka 6 months i've been a hawker..<br />ITs the 1st day while cooking the friking Oil Fly from the POT and Touch my right eye.. i'm now semi Blind for today..<br /><br />Well its called a careless/ or an accident i suppose..<br />Hope the swollen eye will recover soon.. lucky me..<br /><br />The whole day i was out of my mind.. well not to blame but to think of..<br />i kinda start to miss HER..<br />OMGF.. i told myself to not to think about relationship.. what am i doing now?... i wonder eh? sad to say but happy to feel about..<br /><br />Time flies.. its been a few months since we've meet up...<br />hope when she's here next time (maybe august?) we can go out on a date/exercise....<br />well.. May all her things go smooth and well(part of my daily prayers already)..<br /><br />Keep things goin.. i'm going to Thailand(i dont know which part but will be on TRAIN) so... hope she can join me but i have to guts to invite her.. LOL lausy me..<br />Well time flies.. i better go to bed tomorrow HIKING!!!<br /><br />NitezzGoku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-88579363804626841282011-04-16T02:00:00.002+08:002011-04-16T02:08:04.950+08:00Tired but ...Well its been quite some time for me to think of my relationship...(well frankly to say.. too many people ask about it and i dont even know how to answer well).. usually i'll say.. Hey i'm single I'm happy^.^ that's all..<br /><br />But then.. i dont know how.. or what i really can do about it..<br />The situation is..(i want to start up this business build it up and it might take another year to be strong)... i felt lonelyness mostly at night during the path back home.. i am just focusing fully on my business now... although the pay now did increase just by abit.. per month and its still a distance from my target... but shall i just stop thinking about relationships and start fully (i really mean it) focus in my buzz?<br /><br />There is one situation here.. the girl i love.. now is in (not in penang) and she wanted to chase over her dreams... as normal girls would have choosen the path..<br />now.. She told me about her choices.. i gave her my answer of the choices i HOPE she'd choose and yet...(well i am quite confused) at the moment... i really want her to choose the path that she has choosen b4 she tell me about and ask me which 1 i would like her to choose..<br /><br />Complicated enough?<br />i wonder...<br />HELP ME if u see this blog... (well fb me will do>>)<br /><br />Exited of my 2nd branch its another 4 days count down... FOCUS on WORK fully!! (i really want to do All things at once but i know if i do that.. all will fall and fail...)<br />I hope i can make it to the fashion part where i can well.. connect with "HER" atleast... kinda miss those old days when she's still in penang.. lolx..<br /><br />She : Detective Conan...<br />Me : Shin Chan..<br />Well like now we are just friends...or can say close friends?... i dont know... well ignore all this for the time being... i cant help much even if we're in a relationship... i might ruin her life.. LOL<br />thats all i think about.. hope i'm wrong thou.. but its kinda true...<br /><br />Time to sleep its 2am now.. Nitezz Keep get going on with my life...Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-66213891697675753322011-04-03T01:29:00.002+08:002011-04-03T01:34:52.330+08:00Welcome Back ....Wow.. i just realize.. its been a year.. since i've stop Blogging...<br /><br />Alot have changed... Well Now.. its time to set of what i have achieved...<br /><br />Weight : from 139KG (Year 2005) now...<br />96kg..(Updated April 03 2011)<br />Income : from (Year 2005) 0... Now..<br />3k++ per month still increasing(2nd Branch gona open soon)..^.^<br />Business experience : From ( Year 2005) ... Until now...<br />1 year experience..^.^ gona Learn more still<br /><br />Well alot of things have changed.. including my mind..<br />Frankly to say i would like to have a Good gf.. even if its a Long distance Relationship.. i wont mind...<br /><br />Just that maybe she's just not prepared yet i guess.. well dont force things..<br /><br />Focus on my branch 2.. opening in another 8 days time... All the best..^.^ Man Zai GOGOGO!!!Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-52968537058057716732010-04-05T14:55:00.002+08:002010-04-05T15:03:00.466+08:00Time flies...Its been few months now... alot of things happened for a reason.. that's still a believe for me..<br /><br />I've gotten into 2 business now...<br />Although earning still little but hope it'll grow as soon as possible..<br /><br />Sometimes people say time cures everything...<br />(maybe i'm too stubborn of what) I'll always say time will only allow us to get use to things that are such ways which are not what we wanted it to be...<br /><br />Well Let go or not i will still go to KL but this time.... its either Inti Subang... or Nilai Seremban..<br /><br />Chances of changes between this two places are still there...<br />What to do..<br /><br />I guess god really gave me alot of challenges in life..<br />Although some hurts.. some laughter... some smile... some cries...<br />Well Happy, Sad, Angry... Its all just part of life...<br /><br />I now only remembered one things...<br />We dont want the final ending... all we wanted is to enjoy the process...<br /><br />I guess its time for me to Go Full Force on everything then..<br /><br />Dear God. Do Bless not only me.. but those whom i've loved... Hurted... Cherished and abandon by them..<br />Bless all of us to live happily... Smile everyday, stay healthy and...<br />Most of all being able to solve all sorts of problems in our life...<br /><br />My dear friends... a friendship show's me alot of things as the path i go down..<br />I thanks those friends who've been standing aside me all the time .. all the Machi and the jie jie mei mei... lolx<br />Thanks for taking care of me in the past 10 years in the society...<br /><br />Hmmm Since Easter just passed.. Jesus just arise... Let me arise as well..<br />ALL THE BEST JOEL!!<br /><br />Hope to use my japanese name in KL life(Hideaki)~~ heheGoku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-88672735803232571932009-12-06T02:03:00.001+08:002009-12-06T02:12:14.233+08:00Welcome Back JoelSingle life aint bad... Just its been as it was all the time...<br />She is the 1 made me not dare to think up front..<br />But then its good that now i know...<br />I just need to be myself..<br />Even if we were there for each other.. we wont mind what our mind is working..<br /><br />Realizing this point for the 2nd time... Well I should have applied it man.. damn i was stubborn..<br />Back to topic...<br />For those who wanted a Job please contact me...(Company is offering pay from RM1.8k to 2.5k) But have to face with a tough hard and cold blooded interview...<br /><br />Its time to let go Bro(to me la this phrase)<br />Its time to move on...<br />Its time to shine without anything dragging myself down(in my mind when i'm in a confuse mode i'd be dragged SLOWN DOWN...coz of mood Swing and the controling section is been done)<br />I'd stop my blogging for the sake of hers... but then i was wrong...<br />I'd stop myself from being myself... Haha<br />but did i? hehe who knows?<br /><br />She's been viewing my Hi5 lately... i've found out since day 1...<br />But then aihz i dont know bah... maybe she really changed...<br />In sence of her heart...<br />I wonder when she said(when i love someone... i'm very loyalty to that person)... hmm how to judge her love on another person?<br />Who knows... maybe she knows..<br /><br />Well then 21 counts... 1 Get 20 Lose.. LOL my up to date Record of Pikat girls... haha<br /><br />Introducing WELLNESS CONCEPT TO EVERYONE!!!...<br />LETS GET HYPERED UP!!!<br />LETS GO GO GO!!!<br /><br />† Man Zai †Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-45925486402720027382009-10-30T01:33:00.003+08:002009-12-06T02:11:53.361+08:00Let me stop pin pointing...Well to be more clearer now my mind it does...<br />Maybe its because last night i had 7 hour sleep...so...<br /><br />Hmm if time were to let me go back i would just turn 3 days back to go and slap (that time eh me)<br />Ask "me" to wake up!!<br />Learning from this lesson i can see if wana go with fault finding...<br />Both of us also got mistakes made...<br />But my attitude i never want to blame any1...<br /><br />So stop pin pointing... its true at that moment when i lost my mind..<br />The thought of blaming on u did came out...<br />I bet u also got several times of that in your life...<br /><br />Its the 1st time actually to be culculated... because that time i angry because of the mistake you made at your work...<br />but back to me... if i were to claim my EQ = 138<br />I should be able to handle it...<br />Emotion really is the main killer in relationship...<br /><br />I'd told her to think twice b4 doing anything...<br />But did i think twice when i lose my mind?<br />NOPE... the answer is no...<br />I know now that she'll never forgive me... because to her... its my 2nd mistake...<br />Which is a DIE straight sentence...<br /><br />I know that she'll be able to find a better person to be with her in the future..<br />Better then me 100 times should not be a problem..<br /><br />Kinda felt like i am a jerk...<br />Hmmm well learn from mistake and keep get going on my life..<br />Its my MOTO right?<br /><br />Well then dint know why still love her so deeply...<br />After hurting her making me felt guilty(her so called once again)<br /><br />Well all i can say is that i will never step into BLOGGING again...<br />Its one of a source for me to type without thinking..<br />I'll just stop and this will be my last post... thanks<br /><br />† Man Zai †Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-36239213539256540142009-10-29T01:00:00.002+08:002009-10-29T01:15:30.354+08:00† Well its not the way i wanted but its wat she wanted †I've been staying up holding all the hurts that she've created..<br />FInally it burst like a balloon...<br /><br />I am too tired... lack of rest... sommore work load tons of it...<br />I wana die...<br />some times i do hope that god will just take me away just like that...<br />Rather then putting me here.. loving a person who wont appreciate...<br />Caring her with all the extraordinary mind of her working...<br />i dont know weather caring for her is the right thing to do anymore...<br /><br />I am tired...<br />Tired of my life...<br />Tired of me...<br />Tired of me for being so stupid to make the wrong move...<br />Tired of falling in love with a person who will never appreciate what love is...<br />Tired...<br /><br />I still want to work out a finance for my family and my loved ones...<br />Still although all of this accured i still love her..<br />Dumb aint i?<br />fine watever the feeling of my heart shouting and my mind is telling...<br />I dont want to think anymore..<br />Since she dont want it...<br />I'd told her b4 i will never force the 1 that i love..<br />She don wan i'll just take away until she wants it then only see..<br />See how it goes in the future....<br /><br />I'm tired of love...<br />Although love to me is something very important in my life..<br />Its one of my motive that makes me move further...<br /><br />Its also an ingredient of hurt...<br />Being tired all truely...even if she dislikes me...<br />I just hope that she'll pick up her phone... sms me 1 word...<br />The word that will motivate me.. but seems like<br />She'll just ignore me for the rest of my life..<br /><br />Somehow i'm glad that did happen u see?<br />Well once she'd let go of me... she'll be free...<br />Free from her so called burden(which is only the burden she created for herself)<br />Totally able to focus on what she "wanted consciously" and discarding all those "unconscious wants"<br /><br />Although in the end... still i will be the 1 who will suffer the pain...<br />She also will but maybe lesser than what i am facing now...<br />Or maybe she dint suffer at all just got mad of what i've told her..<br /><br />Time flies... i've only slept 3 hours in 48 hour time basis..<br />Going to collapse soon..<br /><br />For now the 1st day i wanted to be alone...<br />But luckly still my K bro's and K sis's all still support me... not only them...<br />All my friends are still there for me...<br /><br />Dint know why until now i still LOVE her...<br />Diao diok liao la...<br />nvm nvm just let it be...<br />Like she'd always mumble time heals...<br />In fact"Time let us to addapt to what we are facing"<br />i'll get use to it soon...<br />Soon enough...<br />Eventhough if i am waiting her...<br />Eventhough if i love her and wanted to wait her...<br />Do i really worth to let her torture?<br />or in anotherway to say...<br />Why did she torture someone she once cared the most?(for atleast afew weeks)<br />hmmm girls... i do understand them now...<br />I understand them because they will never being able to choose to listen either to their heart or to their mind...<br /><br />Fine... EMO-ing person is like that 1...<br />I wont go and bother anymore(i hope i say here i really can make it) coz<br />All the time even when i said i wont care...<br />I still am worried about her....<br /><br />Is this love?<br />not a question to be answered anymore i guess...<br />Lets get some rest tomorrow is another HUGE event day...<br />PS: Jes arh i'll be as busy as u are...so atleast i wont keep on making u "sneeze"(thinking of you)<br />And i remember my class is as such (SUNDAY 1st Nov) 12pm to 2.30pm BM i must do homework which now i have no time to do...<br />I will find maybe friday to finish it up or saturday night....<br />Last but most least... I miss you .....<br />Stupid eyes just stop shedding those tears... I've gotten use to all this pain aint i?<br /><br /><br />† Man Zai †Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-85636964135266345722009-10-26T09:59:00.002+08:002009-10-26T10:28:17.411+08:00† Trying to get an ordinary love while fighting for an extraordinary income †Well all i wanted and i am still praying for...<br />I thank god for giving me such a great lover...<br />She's special, kind, and most important she's the one that i fell for...<br /><br />For now its been sometimes since I've tried to avoid her or is it she's been avoiding me...<br />I don't know..<br />But then i just hope that;<br />My love will be like both loving each other..<br />Thinking of another when we are tired or doing nothing..<br />Or just simply loving them with the heart of prepared to help them anytime?<br /><br />Maybe i am stubborn but I guess the way i keep on telling her i love her have cause her alot of burden...<br />Actually after 1 night of thinking I've realized...<br />Even if i loved her its not necessary to tell her...<br />By telling her will only making her think more...<br />The burden she once told me will hold her back more...<br /><br />So... for now... i can't let go of this love..<br />I don't know how long i can hold it but.. at least after her birthday i hope..<br />Its quite tiring to love a person when they dint want you to love...<br />But then i can say should be the last 1 ady bah..<br />If she'd accept me before i give up,<br />Then we might just go on in the future..<br />If she'd rejected on the day she fell in love with another guy then...<br />I'll just wait until another (one of the 200k person)to pass by...this time..<br />I will CONFIRM (where i wont put any feelings in 1st) not like i am with current one...<br />Then until confirm she want 4ever kinda stuff where we want to settle down no more fooling around..<br />That's what i wanted bah... simple easy and lovely.. which will last at least until i die?<br /><br />For now i will focus on my career building bah...<br />Need to attend more and more appointments...working hard<br />Although hoped to have a person behind me providing some moral support..<br />A simple voice of the loved ones shall bring tons of energy to me i guess..<br /><br />Although frankly to tell when u cant be with your loved ones...<br />Or being rejected is kinda hurt but... i guess<br />I've got used to it already...<br />The heart full of scars...<br />The love which once empty now filled..<br />Which is also one of my false move i guess..<br /><br />But is loving a person a wrong thing to do?(Excellent question but who to answer?)<br />I was once told...<br />"Everyone in this world deserve the love inside your heart" what does that mean?<br />I got the meaning when i started to change myself...<br />Treating everyone similar to others...<br />The word i understand is that not only the 1 i fell for deserve all my love...<br />Even my friends and family should deserve them too..<br /><br />We cant love if we keep on judging right? We cant learn if we don't make mistake...<br />All of these feelings is just something inside me...<br />In order to master it...<br />The changes which i once feared of...<br />Lots of books helped me on self development...<br />Thanks to all the authors...<br /><br />My target is to make my group repeating sales within 4 months time where it allows me to...<br />earn RM5k per months...constantly...<br />Then will go for 20k after that per month... slowly increase..<br /><br />Hit it then i will enjoy for awhile...<br />BALI Island HERE I COME!!!!!!!!<br />STAR WALK i will be there...<br />Penang Bridge RUN WA LAI LIAO!!<br />ALL CHIONG ARH!!!!!!!!<br />Nearly forgotten... Mr Kim's work i am coming also...<br /><br />† Man Zai †Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-3243278545299117022009-10-22T09:02:00.002+08:002009-10-22T09:25:40.266+08:00† Unconciously became a burden to somebody important †Its been few months since i've decided not to give up..<br />But now the love that i once hold on tight have became a burden to the person..<br />The person whom i treated as important as my own life...<br />Now... knowing that the burden i've been for her all this while..<br />The heart pains...<br />The feeling of being your love'd one's burden...<br />This truely sucks..<br />Shall i give up? or i should hold on the love i have for her..<br />Because i still do love her... deeply..<br /><br />All the thinking end up to me is that...<br />If I'd question GOD... I might ask...<br />Why do GOD give me the ability to foresee all types of possible future?<br />Why do GOD give me the ability to be able to connect to the spirit world?<br />If i were without these ability... wont she be more comfortable when she's with me?<br />I guess its not just that bah..<br /><br />Including now her list in her mind is career & studies...<br />no more love.. well i respect that bah..<br />Allow me to reduce all types of burden that i've been creating for her then..<br />Its the most least i can do for her..<br />1stly she never accepts any helps..<br />She's face all types of hardship by herself..<br />She's been in the market now...<br />She can choose what type of guys she likes now..coz her price aint low..<br />I just cant hold her too tight then.. let her choose..<br />Respect her choice...<br />I know the chances of choosing me if i do so will be 0.000000001% but..<br />Should be worth while doing...<br />Being able to help her to reach the ladder of success..<br />Any type of sacrifices will be perfectly ok...<br />Still i hope she'll be with me in the future.... thats all i can say for now...<br /><br />Since the decision being made...<br />I've successfully made her ignore me d..<br />I'll just let it be...<br />By making her ignoring me should be able to reduce alot of burden ady bah..<br />Hehe a capricorn really is able to make everything work according to his plan...<br />But then at the same time... My heart aches...<br />Dint know why... maybe if i do so... i'll lose her in the future..<br />Well its her choice not mine.<br />She already voice up she want to be free...<br />I'll give her freedom alright...<br />I'll just be there doing nothing..<br />With this no more burden, she can focus more yet, she's being able to be free...<br />Suits her right?<br /><br />The hurt that i am facing... i've faced them b4...<br />No big deal... just another failure i suppose?<br />But then why is that everytime i'd love someone truely...<br />GOD will just create so much barriers for me to face?<br />To give me a test on my love life?<br />TO make our bonds together much more stronger?<br />Or.. just simply dint want me to fall in love?<br /><br />PS: Its an answer that i will get after i die bah... hehe<br /><br />Atleast for now... lets do my best to reduce every possible burden that once i've cause her to have in the past...<br /><br />† Man Zai †Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-9114060705667940662009-10-16T19:40:00.004+08:002009-10-16T21:39:49.932+08:00† How i hope you were there †2 days already i'm in this pain and agony...<br />The problems and issues due to my failure of judging one person had caused me..<br />How i hope that you are right behind me holding me tight and say...<br />"Everything will be fine, I'll be right here supporting you"<br />"Must jia you owh...hehe" add on with a smile...<br /><br />My brain nearly cracked due to the thinking of how to solve all this problem that i am facing.<br />Then unconsciously I've come through this which i should have not...<br />=.= why did i press it when my curiosity made me to...<br />Its the same thing she replied to me before...<br />Now it seems like she's already fallen for another guy? or its just an advise from her??<br /><br />I just all of the sudden i felt... I've lost her...<br />But some times she makes me feel that i am still in her (Choice) list...<br />I wanted to be her one and only name on her (Choice) list....<br />but...<br />I dont know...<br /><br />1st time ever when I'm not with her i got this uncertain feeling...<br />But still the box i kept inside my heart the love keeps spreading out from the box..<br />and slowly it had already filling up my empty heart again..<br /><br />I wanted to cry...i wanted to lie down with someone,<br />All i wanted is someplace that i can feel it is home..<br />It is also a feeling that I've gain when I'm with her...<br />and only her can give me that feeling...<br />Just that i cant create more pressure for her.. so better keep this down and low..<br />I wont voice up...<br />My poker face is still on when its needed so no worries..<br /><br />Seems like she's facing her own growing stage from teen to adult...<br />I face it b4 so all i can say is i know its hard but go for it and you'll make it ya?<br />Support will always be given... and thanks for replying my msg "and ignored some" its ok<br />i know you've been busy I'll sms u seldom k?<br />Or maybe you've fallen for another guy i don't know...<br />Anyway All the best for what you're up to ya?<br /><br />I'd better bring out my "Sei Chang" attitude d...<br />Its not her fault nor her responsible to share or feel what i am facing now..<br />I cant bring her down too..<br />Its my feelings not hers...<br />Its the love that i had for her.. not the love she had for me..<br />All of this is my problem its time to be strong to face it all by my self again..<br /><br />But then just now 5pm when i reach home...<br />I felt like i want to collapse..<br />Really did happen again selective "black out" mode...<br />I think this issue(the issue in my work part) have been causing me too much pain<br />I'd better solve it as soon as possible if not it will affect me...<br />And the most feared part is that my emotion will just affect her...<br />Which is something that i wouldn't want it to happen in the future...<br />Well Cheer up everyone... including me...<br />I CAN DO IT... SO CAN YOU(referring to the girl I'd fell for)...<br /><br />Cant stop doing this and kept on felt sorry because scared that it might disturb her too much...<br />Still thinking of her so much...up until now...<br /><br />-Man Zai-Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-79579830227785864372009-10-15T01:05:00.003+08:002009-10-15T01:12:25.001+08:00† I just dont want to interfere anymore †Its time to stop this relationship,<br />Time to hypnotize myself..<br />We are just friends...<br />Very close friends like she said..<br />I'd really like to continue but...<br />i scare she cant handle it...<br /><br />Lets pause here...<br />See how it goes in the future...<br />Since there are so many choice for her now i cant be that selfish...<br />I wanted to be but... its just not fair for her..<br />Let her decide...<br /><br />If in the future she still want to continue it with me then...<br />Lets create this as a password for us...<br /><br />"I Love You"<br /><br />Tell me from the bottom of your heart when u want it k?<br />I'll hide mine away deep deep inside my heart...<br />Wait you owh...<br /><br />But then maximum i guess will wait you for 5 more months bah...<br /><br />If its a no continue then i'll just give up...<br />I've stand up for this relationship and its not hard at all..<br />I felt joy, blisfulness, relax and laughter all the time...<br />Thanks for those sweet memories...<br />I'll keep those now...<br />continue to hold them back until u speak up the secret password...<br />Promise will be kept... even if the relationship have been (de-ranked) hehe<br />Cheers for you Jes...<br /><br />-Man Zai-Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8733560659510649283.post-56851184508133380882009-10-14T15:59:00.004+08:002009-10-14T19:44:10.821+08:00† A Lesson learned †Well finally i found out that why she's so stressed now days...<br />Not only because of me disturbing her by sms-ing her..<br />Mr S also.. and i guess there are more...<br />Now its better to sms her lesser, disturb her lesser because i know..<br />That Mr S wont stop sms-ing her one...<br />She's stress enough just to reply his msg.. so..<br />let me reduce on disturbing her bah...<br />Maybe one day 1 msg in morning 1 phone call at night should do...<br />unless she sms's me i'll 100% reply her...<br /><br />Bie arh... I know u want to keep promises..<br />But sometimes i will let you to do so coz it'll determine weather if u will kept promises that u made or not in the future...<br />This is the 1st promise u gave me and u would want to kept it...<br />Really appreciate it owh bie... thanks...<br />Thank god for giving me such a great lover who'd sacrifice so much for me...<br />Please protect her from any harm nor danger while i'm not around with her..<br />I know that she's troubled enough so better let her deal it alone...<br />If i'm there to disturb her, it will only create more pressure on her...<br /><br />Jes arh... Jia you owh u can do it de... hehe<br />Next WED only meet owh... jia you ya?<br />I'll be right next to you when u needed me the most...<br />Just let me know when u really wanted a person there for you... i'll be there..<br /><br />Well then just assumtion, i dint know why she left her blogger account sign in... izzit she just simply forgot to sign out? or she want to show me something?<br />Well i just log out for her without any second though thou... and the song... i hope she did mean something behind...<br />Bogoshipda...<br />The meaning is thinking of you...<br />Well bie i also am thinking of you all the time...<br />Worried weather what were u busying?<br />Are you taking good care of your health?<br />and some more but... i know<br />i know that if i'd keep on nagging u u'll get fed up of it..<br />Maybe will cause you to hate me or neglect me...<br />All i can say is i love you bie..<br />I Believe that you can make it...<br />I will just be at one small corner which u wont notice to support you all the time..<br /><br />Frankly speaking i was so damned happy when u said u want to come by my place to teach me..<br />Morning i went out caught in the rain awhile after purchasing those eggs and some vegie...<br />Then, my mom phone in when i reach home said she bought lunch..=.=<br />I was like... aihz nvm about that<br />Then when she teaches, her look have been carved in my heart...<br />so pretty when she was smiling at me ..<br />My heart just melted with just that smile.. hehe<br /><br />Well all i have to do now is to support her quitely...<br />Behind the bars where she cant see me...<br />Well then, lets get back to my routine then...<br />she wont read this ady i guess its not in her hot news...<br /><br />Jesyca, my love,<br />Jia you owh,<br />I know u can do it de,<br />Need help i think u know who to find d bah...<br />And i hope the person u find is me owh...<br /><br />PS: Never felt that you are disturbing me any time, anywhere, any place, because you never will k? Jia you owh!!<br /><br />†Man Zai†Goku zaihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04046931923564379560noreply@blogger.com0